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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name. ~William Wordsworth
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It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
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