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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name. ~William Wordsworth
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
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It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
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Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
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